I’ve been thinking a lot about time. About how once it’s gone, it’s gone. For the longest time I thought that was the worst thing. I thought about all the time I’d wasted. All the time that I’d thrown away that was gone forever. I thought about every time I sat in a classroom at work playing games on my phone when I could have been on my feet out in the street making photographs, planning a better lesson, writing a blog post, studying some Japanese, studying some English, talking to someone. How many days, weeks, months, fuck, years of my life have I spent not being productive, not pushing forward, not trying to better myself? The answer is incalculable. But then I had another thought: how much of my life do I consider to have been wasted? Fucking none of it.
I’ve been thinking a lot about what photography means to me.
2017 was the most important year of my life.
Four months without a post. I really let things slip there. I got busy, I’m still busy. The blog kind of fell by the wayside as a bunch of stuff happened. Along with several other things that I’ve let drop off in the last few months I want to get back into writing. . One of the main reasons I’ve let the blog rot so long is that my laptop was fucked and unusable. The 20 minutes or so I tend to spend editing photographs had become an hour or two while I waited for the little wheel of death to finish doing its thing. More and more stuff got piled on the desk, the laptop becoming less and less accessible for increasingly annoying editing sessions until this week when I formatted the whole thing and started again.
Am I going to do what everyone else ever has done and write about GAS? Probably. I won’t say the gear isn’t important in a lot of kinds of photography. But for the reasons I shoot I’m really not convinced. My want of a camera over a phone is the feel of it. I love the weight (not too much) of a camera in hand. I love the shape, the dials, the thumb rest. I could ruin my credit card and buy a digital Leica. I could solve the one ‘problem’ I have with my camera – the size – and buy the GRII or an X100F. Until I kill this camera though, I won’t. Even then, it’ll be time for debate.
I’ve been enjoying photo diaries lately. In particular Matt Martin and Matt Gomes‘ super sweet feeds. I wrote before about how I was feeling stoked on just shooting all day every day. On Wednesday I took my camera out with the intention of just shooting my day. It was pretty freeing to point and shoot and think about my Wednesday and my life in general.
Here’s what I got. In chronological order:
If you look through my portfolio on here or at my Instagram, it’s pretty obvious I rarely shoot in the dark. There’re multiple reasons: I work until 9, 9:30, then I’m hungry, then it’s 11pm and I’m in my apartment full of food being my most common excuse. Usually when I am out after dark it’s because I’m with people. People have plans. People get fed up of me stopping to take pictures of things. I usually want to hang out more than I want the photo anyway. Being dreadful at shooting in the dark is my number one thing to fix at the moment. Second being dreadful at portraits – more on that later I’m sure. So, when Cody invited me out shooting, I happily went along.